change is the only constant

Posted: January 25, 2009 in feelings, observations, people, relationships, thoughts

everything else is variable..  i completely agree with that proverb.

everyone changes at some point, i believe it happens at least once every 5 years of ones life, some change occurs in preferences, taste, degree of stubbornness, some qualities mellow out, others become more intense.. even if it was a very small change, it happens, personally, some things i liked 5 years ago don’t quite matter to me now..

so when you realize that your partner/spouse is changing.. in ways you did not see/expect, what do you do? do you immediately run away? do you doubt the foundation of your relationship? does it make you evaluate your current partner’s personality as a separate one from the initial personality you knew him/her with? i guess what I’m trying to ask is: would change eventually lead to an end?

one cant always be certain of everything, however, in relationships, i reckon its more of a leap of faith! you’re not certain of how things will go, but you have almost utmost faith in your better half.. or at least that’s what the idealist in me thinks.. i believe love will conquer all.. yeah yeah i know, wishfull thinking, foolish optimist, etc etc.. but that’s what i believe.. love should be the foundation, the base, the essence. and it should be the reason for eventual acceptance, and a partner’s accomodation to those changes. also, i find talking helps, there should be clear communication between a couple to figure out what is the reason behind any change, especially if that change is dramatic. coz i dont think anyone wakes up to realize something has changed! its a process, and stages, and unless the couple communicates properly, it will go unnoticed until it hits you one day and you find yourself in a rut!

the scary part is not knowing how to take a leap of faith anymore..

  1. KJ says:

    i hear you, and many people can relate.

    But eventually, you’ll have a leap of faith, and someone will grab you at the other end.

  2. As you said, one must communicate with their partner to discuss the changes you observe. Then one must decide if these changes are too much to bear, and then decide if it’s worth adapting to those changes, or leave. It all depends on what the changes are and what one is willing to adapt to.

  3. Hala says:

    I was going to say the same thing Marvin the Martian said, communication is the easiest, shortest, and most reliable way to sustain a relationship.

    And yes, I do believe change would eventually lead to an end.

  4. hala: even if its a subtle change? we cant stay the same forever! does that mean all marriages r doomed and all relationships will end?

  5. Hhussk says:

    Change is the only constant, but it is not the only universal equation.

    One of the other universal equations is “That which surrounds you, becomes you”, and it is also true and applies to your relationships. That is why some couples grow together while others grow apart. Sometimes you do not like what you are becoming.

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