Archive for October 7, 2008

fashion donts (2)

Posted: October 7, 2008 in damdoumization, fashion, men, random

after fashion donts 1 which was aimed at girls, enter fashion donts 2! in which i shall commence to dissect the fashion crimes that some men all over the world are guilty of.

1. the worst thing a man can do by far: wear a suit without a belt, even SANTA knows better!!

it does nothing good for your look, so please never EVER go out without a belt on a suit, formal trousers or even jeans! only pairs of anything wearable that can do without a belt are shorts, capris and khakis, but a suit or jeans (whether proper formal jeans or torn out/worn out jeans) without belts are a complete murder of fashion!

2. which brings us to another suit/jeans no-no, WHITE SOCKS.

Never, and i mean NEVER, even under threat, wear white socks under a suit or jeans, even if you’re wearing sneakers, thats what gray was created for! wear only dark shades matching your suit and/or shoes color. the most tricky suit color is navy blue, if you’re not wearing a navy blue shoe since they are SO unbelievably hard to find even for women attire, wear a black shoe with black socks, and if you chose to wear dark brown shoes under a navy blue suit (which i personally find more appropriate and a lot classier than black) then you wear navy blue socks matching your suit shade or dark brown matching your shoe color.

3. suspenders, one word: why???

unless you are a) a cop b) a chick c) steve urkel (jaleel white), then suspenders should not exist in your fashion vocab!

4. formal wear in very luminous bright colors:

please view exhibit A:  and exhibit B:

unless you’re in show business or a clown, please refrain from wearin a red suit or a magenta shirt to work. it doesnt ‘scream’ professionalism.

5. sequined shirts and t-shirts (need i include – GULP – pants?!): 

if its not halloween and you’re going as 1) Elvis 2) a drag queen 3) a disco ball, then DO not, for the love of God, wear anything sequined!

6. the ‘white boy’ afro:

we do not need to witness you challenging mother nature & growing your hair against gravity, especially if you’re not black at birth!! nothing more tacky than a white boy thinking he’s P Diddy, even Eminem knew better, he kept his over peroxided do as he sang black.

there’s so much more on my mind, but of course, thats what sequels are for!